… shaking it off… and heading out in search of balance…

Posts tagged ‘guilt’

feelin the burn

well, i took the plunge!

noooo i’m not married… it aint gonna happen people!

but i did; however, get on the scale this morning… wrote the number down, subtracted from the goal and was left with a disgustingly large number.
ughhhhhhh… seriously!?!??!
do you ever stop and wonder… how did i get here??

BUT, that being said… i was proud of myself… b/c i marched out of the bathroom and got on with my day!!

a tip of the proverbial hat to mama pea for suggesting that i a) magic bullet up the spinach and almond milk for my smoothie before adding anything else and 2) shaking the magic bullet when it gets stuck (if anyone official from magic bullet reads this… i NEVER shook the magic bullet while using it… my friend suggested this and i told her i was pretty sure that was not recommended and that b/c i cared so much for my magic bullet, i would NOT engage in said activity… oh wait… like anyone official from anywhere reads this blog… hahahahahaha alas, it was fun to pretend!)

ANYHOOOO… the result…


– spinach
– chocolate almond milk
– greek yogurt
– blueberries
– ice

then continuing my productive morning, i packed my lunch!! look at me goooo!!

pretty good huh?
right, well, i never ate it… b/c i totally forgot the food cart “big ass sandwiches” (that’s right) was donating 100% of their profits and tips to the relief effort in Haiti today, i, well, i…. they were donating the profits to Haiti!

suffice it to say it was a big.ass.sandwich! i took off half the bread though… that’s gotta count for something, right??

ok so LUNCH = HEALTHY LIVING FAIL

BUT… i’m confident i made up for it when i hit the gym tonight… i was ready to roll, and elipticized my a** off for 25 minutes pretty much as hard as i could go with varying intensity for those 20 minutes, and then i switched it over to the treadmill (ughhhhhh the freaking treadmill) and walked for another 20 minutes, varying from walking fast at a mellow incline and then walking a little slower but at a much steeper incline…

I AM FEELIN THE BURN!!!

after the gym, i sucked down a LOT of water, stretched, and dove face first into dinner!

anne was super nice and made one of my favs… taco salads!

we snagged this salsa at whole foods tonight and it’s definitely a keeper!!


and in case anyone is wondering who makes the best guacamole in the history of the world… the answer is ANNE!

okayyyyy so now it’s thursday morning… for some reason my internet just went completely down last night, right before i posted… what the!?!?!?

but that’s ok b/c it allowed me to wake up STARVING this morning, and inspired to throw down a KATIE inspired banana hammock!!

perfectly ripe (interpretation slightly green) banana, drizzled with almond butter, dusted with dark chocolate cocoa powder and a few crushed up pretzels…

and i’m out…

i can eat the “whole bowl”???

so i’ve been absent a couple days. the short story is that it’s been a rough weekend, which started with too much of this:

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and ended with GUILT and FRUSTRATION… no photo necessary there.

anyway, i took some time this weekend. i know i have to give myself a break and just keep trying to do better, but sometimes it’s HARD. so i did some relaxing, thinking, and attempting to get back to center.

i did have a review of sorts to discuss though! i said a few weeks ago that i wanted to make an effort to lead a much healthier life, but that i did not want that quest to mean i had to give up being a part of the culture and the city that i love.

i reviewed an aspect of portland culture -here-, and had so much fun with it that i wanted to do it again!

enter, the whole bowl

Whole Bowl CR

i’d heard a lot about this portland food cart, but decided it was time to give it a whirl!
so anne and i braved a portland downpour, and headed that way for lunch.

the whole bowl is pretty much just that…

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it tells you what’s in it…

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– brown rice
– sour cream
– olives
– avocado
– cilantro
– tali sauce
– cheddar cheese
– salsa
– black & red beans

so i ordered it straight up (no additions or deletions)…

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i mixed it all together, and dove in…

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i was a little worried about the “tali sauce” given that it’s a “secret”… i wasn’t sure if it had any sort of cream in it, which would make it a little heavy for me… but i heard the guy behind me order it “dairy free” and that only eliminated the sour cream and cheese. i was curious about the “tali sauce” so i read up on it and it seems it is vegan as well as gluten free!! i was SO excited to hear that b/c i knew that meant it obviously was not made with a heavy cream, and that’s excellent news b/c the tali sauce IS EXCELLENT!

i was also a little worried about whether the one bowl of food would be filling… ummm no problems there! i was completely full, and stayed that way for a long time.

yep, i ate THE WHOLE BOWL, and it was fantastico!!

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i said above that i took some time to CENTER this weekend, so i want to close with the following:

i actually started thinking about this the other day at work when i was looking out one of our office windows.

i looked east and found:

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extremely stormy weather

then to my surprise i looked west and found:

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beautiful blue skies!

i sat there for a minute thinking about how much prettier the blue sky was, i even started to zone out, when someone else came into the room and called me out on my window gazing. i pointed out to him how strange it was that the sky looked so miserable to the right, and so beautiful to the left.

and then he said, “yes, but look at what is straight ahead”…

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the rainbow

i realized i’d been so wrapped up in considering blue skies v. thunderstorms that i completely missed the center, which was right in front of me.

so tonight i leave with this:

i have to remember that balance is the center. i too often get caught in the extremes… feeling dark and stormy and then wanting to swing completely the other way and find bright blue sky.

when in fact… the rainbow exists between the extremes… in the center